I'm With Him

I worked in a bookstore for many years. It was my first job out of college and at the time I was disappointed in myself that I didn't have my shit together enough to get some great job that would catapult me to a successful career and hefty paycheck. Now I look back on those days of being "just a bookstore clerk" with much fondness.

I believe that everyone should work some kind of customer service job in their lives. Partly because it teaches you how to be a better human being and partly because you get the best stories from working with the public.

Recently this little chestnut from those days came to mind.

While working at a small, independent bookstore in Los Angeles (which has now sadly gone the way of the dodo), I had gotten in the habit of asking customers if they had NPR affiliations. As booksellers, we tended toward the erudite and classical and offered discounts to similarly-minded patrons. Members didn't always know to ask for the discount, so I liked to prompt them because who doesn't like to save a few bucks? No one.

One day I was ringing up a woman's purchases and asked automatically "Are you a member of KCRW or KUSC?"

"No, why?" she replied.

"Oh, well, we give a discount for members," I explained. I always hated that part because once people knew they could save a little cash, they wanted in on the deal. If they said, "oh, wait, maybe I am," I felt compelled to call them on their bluff and would ask to see their membership card (ever politely, of course). Or maybe then they just felt cheated. If you can discount to one group, why not to all? I had seen a lot of different reactions to this question, but I was unprepared for this woman's response.

She reached into her blouse and pulled out a cross. "I'm with Him. That sould qualify for a discount."

Sadly, it did not. JC didn't carry the same cachet as NPR. Having an "in" with JC didn't qualify you for 10% off. But an eternity of peace to look forward to… that's got to count for something, right?