Doing Nothing Is Hard

At the beginning of June, my husband left for a month of military training. I fantasized that I would spend this month reading by the pool, catching up on my Netflix queue and reveling in the solitude. But it turns out being able to relax and do nothing takes a great deal of effort.

I naturally assumed that any messes in the house were entirely my husband's fault and that with him gone there would be no need for cleaning. As it turns out, I have a tendency to use dishes, splash water in the sink and trail dirt into the house. Unfortunately all of these things require cleaning and pester me to rethink years of complaining about my husband's messiness. (For now I'll focus on the cleaning.)

On top of this, I have work to do. Several part-time jobs and volunteer obligations for different organizations take up the time and effort of a normal full-time gig.

It turns out I am also quite the social butterfly. Between luncheons, dinners and other get-togethers, I've battled loneliness and been kept company by wonderful friends.

But if you were to ask me what I've been up to, I honestly couldn't tell you.

We have a tendency to downplay the little things in life and to solely report marriages, children and job developments to alumni magazines. But our lives are made up more of little things than the big  life-changing events. The daily small tasks, chores, triumphs and quiet moments should be embraced as the treasures and accomplishments of our lives.

I'm reminded of a time I babysat two young boys. We had a great time. We played in the yard, walked the dog, picked lemons and made fresh lemonade, drew pictures, played board games… When their parents got home and asked what we had done, the boys shrugged and said "nothing." I was astounded.

I find that as an adult I'm still doing nothing. And it's keeping me extremely busy.

Today, nearly three weeks into my month alone, finds me enjoying my second "me" day of the month (including weekends). This is a day for me to do whatever I want – no events on the calendar or pesky to do list. (Rather I am willfully ignoring the 2-page pesky to do list sitting on my kitchen counter). Simply to get to the point where I could take a "me" day required additional preparation to ensure things would be settled enough that I might neglect them for a spell.

What have I done today? So far I have written in my journal, finished a book I'd been working on for the past five weeks, gone jogging, made taco salad, watered the plants, rearranged some furnishings, hung some art, deleted old emails, updated computer files, caught up on my blog, and hopefully later I'll go to the pool. You know… nothing.